Rejected commercial for the HP ENVY X360 13.3" i7 Convertible Touch Laptop:
PROGRAMMER: Actually, this HP Envy is a complex computer that can do most of the work you used to need your brain for. Now you can just goof off and enjoy!
ZOMBIE: Society is doomed
[HP logo appears]
4MB Cache Processor Core: Dual-Core Screen Size: 13.3" Aspect Ratio: 16:9 Resolution: 3200 x 1800 Display Type: QHD+ UWVA eDP WLED-backlit multitouch-enabled edge-to-edge glass Graphics: Intel HD Graphics 620 Memory: 16GB DDR3 (on-board) Hard Drive: 1TB PCIe NVMe M.2 SSD Optical Drive: None Network: None Wireless: 802.11ac Bluetooth: Yes Card Reader: Multi-Format Card Reader Sound: B&O Play Dual Speakers Webcam: HP TrueVision HD Webcam (front-facing) Microphone: Integrated Digital Keyboard: Full-size island-style backlit Pointing Device: HP Imagepad with multi-touch gesture support I/O Ports: HDMI: 1 USB 3.1 (Type-C): 1 USB 3.1: 3 Combo Headphone/Mic Jack: 1 Operating System: Genuine Windows 10 Professional (64-bit) Power: 45W AC Adapter
3-cell Li-ion battery Dimensions: 0.63 in (H) x 12.8 in (W) x 8.6 in (D) Weight: 3.15 lbs
In the box:
- HP ENVY X360 13t-y000 Convertible Laptop, 13.3" QHD+ Touchscreen, Intel Core i7-7500U 2.7GHz Dual-Core, 1TB M.2 Solid State Drive, 16GB DDR3, 802.11ac, Bluetooth, Win10Pro-64
- AC Adapter
Maybe you're a serious camper who hikes miles and miles into the wilderness and spends days out there alone. That's cool! But maybe you're a person who sets this tent up in your backyard, 10 feet away from your house, and just uses it as a chill spot to read and hang out. That's cool too! Wherever you set up your tent is home. Even if it's really really close to your actual home.Sprout 2-Person Tent Dimensions: 6'W x 3.2'H x 5'D Weight: 4.3 lbs. Alpine 3-Person Tent Dimensions: 8.5'W x 4'H x 8'D Weight: 8.0 lbs. Packed Size: 25.25" x 6.75" x 6.75" Evergreen 6-Person Tent Dimensions: 11'L x 6'H x 9'D Weight: 17 lbs. Packed Size: 27.5" x 9" x 9" Doors: 2 Windows: 3 Great Basin 9-Person Tent Dimensions: 18'L x 6'6"H x 10'D Weight: 24 lbs. Rooms: 2 Floor Area: 159 sq. ft. Packed Size: 26.5" x 10.25" x 10.25" Great Basin 10-Person Tent Dimensions: 18'L x 6'6"H x 10'D Weight: 28 lbs. 2 oz. Rooms: 3 Floor Area: 159 sq. ft. Packed Size: 27" x 10.75" x 10.75"
Made in China
In the box:
(1) Wenzel Alpine 3-Person Tent
The TV today does almost everything the computer did in the 1990s. Before too much longer the TV will just be a big computer on the wall. We already know this won't be the last TV you buy. Why pretend? Technology WILL get better and better! But until we get there, you still need a TV, right? Right.G
Rome fell because of barbarians? No! Rome fell because people forgot how to use cookware! They outsourced to servants and then they didn't know how to take care of themselves. The Pre-Colonial British Empire fell because of the Magna Carta? No! The Pre-Colonial British Empire fell because of the spread of cookware! Nobody needed to go before the King's Hearth to get dinner because they could just take care of it at home! You gotta get in on this scam before someone else takes over your life with the power of cookware. Seriously. COOKWARE. CHANGES. EVERYTHING.
In the Box:
(1) Cuisinart 12-Piece MultiClad Pro Cookware Set, MCP-12MN
- (1) 2 Qt. Saucepan w/Cover
- (1) 3 Qt. Saucepan w/Cover
- (1) 10" Skillet
- (1) 12" Skillet w/Helper
- (1) 3.5 Qt. Saute Pan w/Cover
- (1) 5.5 Qt. Casserole w/Cover
- (1) 12" Everyday Pan w/Cover
If you're doing it right, the fixtures go in and then you never think about them again. They stay quietly in place as you suffer through all the hardships of home ownership. Maybe your kids take over the house one day and the same fixtures keep doing their job. Maybe the grandkids replace them during a plumbing overhaul down the line. That's why they're fixtures. They affix. They remain.
- Blend: 80% Tempranillo, 15% Syrah, 5% Tannat
- Stainless Steel Fermentation
- Alcohol: 13.6%
- Production: 1000 Cases